Hey Hey Hey,
What are you doing? Do you have your bush pilot's certification yet? Or are you taking a more culinary approach? Is Colin Foster still alive?

Yeah but he's a total fag. Also he has become one of those drunken assholes who picks fights. I am nothing but a junk mail receiver these days nils. Where ya been? What are you doing in the summer? I have to go to fucking group therapy now. Catch you later.

Ahhhh!
Well if Colin's a fag, then fuck him. I hate fight picking, drunk douches! Still up in VT doing the pizza thing. Working a bit at a summer camp nearby this summer. You should totally skip out on AR and join the amazing ranks of VT for the summer! Lot's of trees, swimming and good people! What the hell are you in group therapy for? Tell me some stuff and lose the junk. I think I'm gonna hang a hammock in my room in the spirit of summer...
Much Love,
Nils


for my anxiety disorder (isn't that great? I have my very own disorder now) it is recommended that I go to group and mano i mano each week. I'll be in Nova Scotia for the summer and the mediterranean, maybe we could somehow possibly see eachother maybe. Somehow. 
Don't Much Love Me Just Because I Have to Go to Group Therapy,
Kara

You can't tell me where I put my love you sassy cunt! So, you're anxious eh? Well, at least you'll stay on your toes and always be ready for arbitrary raptor attacks... Or the second coming of Jesus... Nova Scotia again? For the farming I imagine. I support your decision, yet demand that you stop in VT on your way. If you choose not to visit me, I will call the mounted police and fabricate an elaborate story involving you and a meth lab. So, you now have my ultimatum. Besides the anxiety, how has UofA been? 
Puppies, Pink Fuzzy things, Atari game consoles, the smell of gasoline, Catholic Priests and oh yeah MUCH LOVE,
Nils

but okay I'll visit you. It may be that I will be going by way of spain, so spare me your nagging if I'm a little late. And why the fuck can't you visit me? We'll both get to eat better food and I'm sure you'll be wanting a break from your housewifing. I really am always ready for raptor attacks, but they're planned, you see. For some reason all the raptors are out to get me. And Jesus, although last time my peeps got him first. The U of A is better than I thought, although people are stupid and friendly, which I expected. The classes are good though. 
Your Mounts Will Never Find Me Bitch!
Kara

well oh well, spain eh? what's in spain? well i guess plenty of things are in spain, but why are you going? You have to visit me because VT is between AR and Nova Scotia. It geometrically-sensical... I actually have a plan right now to be in Memphis at teh beginning of May for a music fest, so if you feel like coming to memphis, I'll be there for like 4 days methinks... But otherwise I expect to see you in the Green Mountains just south of Canada..
On another note, stupid and friendly seem to go hand in hand in the South. Especially in AR. A man from Texas approached my friends and I at the bar the other night and terrified my friends with his light humour and southern hospitality... I forgot how creepy it is... My Mounties are very good. Don't doubt them. I have a man on the inside...
I miss the honky-tonks, dairy queens and 7-11's,
Nils

Oh yeah but you said to tell you stuff-
I sometimes lay awake at night and wonder why I am even alive. I can't sleep. I've had one full blown panic attack, and I cry daily. I read something they passed out at the last group though and it at least got me thinking about my life instead of just dreading it. Cheesily enough, it was called Rights and Responsibilities. I need to not watch TV, ever, because it makes me feel really depressed and angry. I freak out about alot of stuff and feel really useless in terms of my whole jeus complex of coming down here to 'save my family'. What the fuck was I thinking? That they needed saving? I worry about my mother's legs getting cut off (diabetes) in ten years and having to take care of her, one stupid life event after another. I feel differently about my life than I did when I was younger, but my brain is developing into the drippy selfishness of a suicidal maniac. I'm serious. I have caught myself thinking about how much better off I would be if it all just stopped, if all of this would just go away, all my memories of jesse crying on the couch in a little ball of pain and my morbid fantasies of us all just dying and suffering slowly, in some sort of disaster of nazist regime, if I could just escape everything. This one is not for you nils. I won't send you this one.